Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Why send a normal e-mail when one like this will do?

My BFF, Ashley, & I e-mail almost daily.  Sometimes it's just a quick note to say Hey...sometimes it's a little more.  All depends on our moods and how our jobs are treating us that day.  Good mood and/or good work day?  Short e-mails.  Bad mood and/or bad work day?  Longer e-mails.

I try to be creative in my e-mails...since we e-mail so often. 

Here are some examples...

What I could've said..."I had a dream that I was dating your sister's husband"

But what I did say was this:

OK…so all.flipping.week. I’ve had these CRAZY dreams. Seriously, since Saturday it’s been this ongoing case of crazy dreams. Wednesday night, I dreamed that I met one of my blog/twitter friends (it could happen, she lives in NC) and she was a total witch in real life. Last night’s dose of craziness???? I was dating Hank. Yes, Hank, as in your brother-in-law, your sister’s husband. Now to be fair, he wasn’t married in my dream. At least I don’t think so. And also, I’m not 100% sure it was Hank, as in your sister’s husband, or if it was just a guy named Hank. But as I was passing through that fine line between dreamworld and total consciousness, my brain said “you can’t date Hank, he’s married to Meredith”.

I think I need to go on some kind of meds. Xanax, Wellbutrin, anything that they give true psycho people. I’m checking myself into Dorothea Dix over the weekend.

Maybe they will let me out for Easter…

Or how about this one?
I could've said "my crazy co-worker is wearing a turtleneck sweater today"
But what I did say was this:
I would just like to say, for the record, that today is March 21st.

Yesterday was the first day of spring.

Today’s high is 69. Tomorrow’s high is 80.

I realize it’s cloudy today and not nearly as warm as it was on Friday or even Saturday afternoon, but seriously, it is NO LONGER turtleneck sweater wearing weather.

That is all.

And later in the same week...
Ummm…another turtleneck today.


And later that day...

Oh. Em. Gee.

I missed the cords.

Cords in March??? With a turtleneck sweater???

And this is a more recent one...what I could've said is "I went to the park and got creeped out by a man, so I left", but it reads so much better like this:

So, seriously…I was truly inspired by your Chick-Fil-A tailgating…and I thought, hey it’s a nice day and I’ll go eat my lunch at the park.

My hesitation was that there might be a playground full of screaming toddlers, but I thought, I’ll just deal.

When I got to the park, there was this guy there…middle age, kind of skank looking…

And when I went to the picnic table, he said “hey, how you do-ring?”

Chills down my spine.

I was nice. Said I was fine. Tried to ignore him.

There was another girl there sitting on a bench at the playground…I figured I was OK as long as someone else was there.

Then a mom and her toddler came out to play…

But when they left, it was just me and the creepy skank man…

So, I left.

I think I will not go to the W-town park for lunch anymore. Ever.


the end

To which she replied:

Well, I knew my the mere look of this email that it was not going to be a funny or lighthearted one.

Mainly because

you double-spaced

each line which meant

there were things in there that,

under angrier circumstances,

would have been numbered.

I tend to number things when I'm stressed and/or venting! :)

Happy Wednesday!


Katie said...

Hahaha!! I number things too when I'm upset. :) ps-- was it me that was the witch in your dream???

PBJdreamer said...

SO glad you have a friend to vent to!!

This post was fun AND funny!!

that is all

Adrienne said...

I think it's awesome you and friend email back and forth! :) I should send me BFF an email now!