Could-a, should-a, would-a Saturday

I could-a...

gone to the store to get some cleaning supplies to clean my nasty shower and mop my tea-spotted kitchen floor (sweet tea...thank you very much Dylan)

I should-a...

paid some bills and reconciled my check book

I would-a...

gone swimming and to the Newsong concert if it hadn't rained today (the concert was outdoors)

Instead, I...

 - did a quick clean when I thought my favorite twins were coming to visit
 - bugged Dylan...A LOT
 - laid on the couch and read a book
 - went to dinner at CiCi's with my parents
 - read a lot of blogs today and found some new ones to follow

All in all, the best kind of Saturday! :)

Friday!

Time for some Friday Follows!!!



and...



and also...






Fun stuff!  If you are visiting from one of these, Welcome!  Look around...let me know you were here!

Now...I'm participating in a new blog thingy today...I love, love, love a survey...and I've seen this on some others, but never participated before!  So, here goes...




1. Did you have a favorite blanket or toy as a kid? If so, do you still have it?

Yes - my teddy bear Joshua.  My uncle gave him to me when we visited him in Iowa when I was four.  My sister was 6 mos old and not a very good traveler.  I think he realized I needed something special.  And yes, I still have him and sleep with him at night.  Really...

2. Do you dream in color?

Usually, if I remember my dreams

3. How tall are you? Do you wish you were shorter or taller?

I'm 5'4"...sometimes I wish I were taller, but usually it's not that big of a deal

4. If you could have anyone's (celeb or other) voice as the guide on your GPS, who would it be?

James Earl Jones...I love his voice

5. Do you return your shopping cart to the corral or leave it wherever in the parking lot?
 
ALWAYS return my shopping cart...people leaving it wherever in the parking lot drives me nuts!
 
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Hope you have a great weekend!!!

Distracted...

This week I've been super distracted.  It seems like no matter what, I just don't want to be at work...I don't want to do anything...I just want to "be".  I spent all day trying to stay focused on my work, but constantly checking my facebook, e-mail and blogger.  So many distractions.  I had plenty of work and the other girl I work with wasn't there today...I usually LOVE when she's gone because I get all the work and I get to do it the way I WANT the work done.  I'm just a tad particular and I wish she would do everything exactly as I do...but of course, that's not reality.  So, I try to choose my battles and decide what HAS to be done the way I want it and let the other things slide.  But, no...I've let everything distract me today. 

I'm blaming it on the "lazy days of summer".  That must be it.

So glad tomorrow is Friday...hopefully, it'll be a little more productive!

A few of my favorite things...

If I were Julie Andrews, aka Maria von Trapp, and I had to comfort 7 children during a horrible storm, these would be in my song of "My Favorite Things":

cotton candy, rainbows, the beach, holding Aly's hand, Ayden's face, Redken hair products, my sister's front porch, my kid, puppies, kittens, pushing buttons, Gilmore Girls, coffee, Target, hydrangea, Mary Poppins, The Wizard of Oz, piano music, the Mast General Store in Valle Crucis, mint chocolate chip ice cream in a waffle cone from Kilwin's Ice Cream in Blowing Rock, reading a good book, watching movies, sleeping in on Saturday morning, baptisms, lavender, chocolate chip cookies, Appalachian State University, Christmas trees, music, my family, coloring, chicken-n-dumplins, Sour Patch Kids, purses, old houses, antiques, "old" people, eating at The Loop, hot chocolate with lots of marshmallows, marshmallows by themselves, flip flops, pedicures, coffee mugs, looking at pictures, having a lazy day...

Happy Wednesday! :)

What-if?

Did you ever read those “Choose Your Own Adventure” books when you were younger? I had a couple of those and used to love reading them. You would get to a certain spot in the story and YOU, as the reader, could choose how the story would continue. I would always read the story to the end with one path and then go back and re-read it choosing the opposite path. No matter how many twists you chose, the story had at least two very different outcomes…which I guess was the point of the book!


In yesterday’s Monday Minute, the question was raised, “Who is your what-if person?” …to which I replied, “I could probably write a whole post on this” and then proceeded to give three of my what-if’s. Of course, my good friend Ian commented, “How's about you do a whole post about #1?” Well, nothing like a thought-provoking question…ok and a good thunderstorm…to keep you up at night.

I will say, the “what-if” road is a slippery slope to travel. Trust me…I’ve been there before. And it’s only because I feel full grounded in the “what-did” that I feel like I’m able to share my “what-if’s”. There are a few “what-if’s” that I will not explore…it would just be too painful to try to see that part of my life NOT unfolding as it did. And I’m good with that. But at the insistence encouragement of Ian, I’ll explore, for your reading pleasure, my what-if person(s)! :)

I first must give you a little background of me. As a high school student, I didn’t have one of those “these are the best days of my life” kind of high school experience. But it wasn’t horrible either. I had one small relationship as a freshman in high school…he “dated” me until another girl caught his interest and he moved on. It really wasn’t that big of a deal and we remained friends. It was hard for me to see most of the guys in my high school as “dating” material…I had known a lot of them since 3rd grade and the ones I didn’t know, didn’t seem to know me either. It was OK. I described myself once as “the girl that doesn't care if she has a guy or not, but secretly hoping that one will notice her”. But, as it were, I spent my high school days single…and not really upset about that. I was always the good girl…following rules…never testing my parents.

I think it’s important for you to know where I came from to understand where I went…

As a college freshman, I was young…immature…vulnerable. And that’s when I met my first “what-if”. His name was Travis and as I look back on the events, I see red flags everywhere. First, he was 23 to my very young 18 - he was a 5th year senior (double major). I met him at a football game where one of his friends tried to pick a fight with a guy sitting in front of us. He was rip roaring drunk…but he paid attention to me in a way no other guy before had. I dated Travis for 10 months…in all that time, he never once gave me an ounce of hope towards any kind of commitment. We’d go strong for a while…I’d get mad…we wouldn’t speak for a couple of weeks…and then the cycle would start all over again. He completely ignored my request to “stay pure” …although, I take partial blame in that in not sticking to my guns and putting myself in the position to be taken advantage of. And once the line was crossed, there was no going back. By that point, I had become a different person…not caring that I had made this major breach in the commitment to myself. And things finally came to a grinding halt the week before I was to move back for my sophomore year. I’d been begging him to meet my family…he kept putting it off. But he’d finally agreed that he would come to Boone on moving day to meet my parents. However, the week before, I could never get in touch with him. I called numerous times…left countless messages…and all for naught. He never returned one call. OK – he did…but I was two months into school and he’d finally gotten my number from a mutual friend. However, I’d moved on at that point to what-if #2. But, what-if I hadn’t? What-if I had not gotten tired of the on again/off again status of our relationship. What-if I had trailed along for a longer period of time…just waiting for him? I’m not sure…I said the other day that I most likely would’ve ended up divorced if I’d married him. I’m not sure that it would’ve ever come to that point…I’d like to think I would come to my senses before I made such a horrible decision. But what-if he’d been Dylan’s father? Now, there’s a question…one that I think I’ll just leave hanging out there. Because, I truly believe God protected me from that happening.

After the Travis fiasco, I met what-if #2…who became Dylan’s father. Well, didn’t “become”…he IS Dylan’s father. There is no “what-if I never met him” because the only way I wouldn’t have met him is if I hadn’t returned to school that year. Because, as it turned out, Andrew was my neighbor. My sophomore year, I lived in a co-ed dorm. They were suites…but the floors were co-ed. My roommates were determined to hook someone up with one of our neighbors…and I guess they felt like I needed to get away from the caustic relationship with Travis. Enter Andrew. Andrew was a 180 from Travis. He was a “good guy”. When I found out I was pregnant, things began to disintegrate. It was then that I realized I didn’t really know Andrew. I didn’t know him the way that a person carrying his child should know him. But here’s the thing, I know looking back that if he’d asked, I would’ve married him. I would’ve made it right. He didn’t want to marry just because we were having a child…which on this side of things, I’m very thankful for. And after Dylan was a little over a year old, we began dating again for the third time…and almost did get married. And so, what-if we had married? Well, this is a path that’s hard to see as well. I probably wouldn’t be living in NC. I’d probably be a school teacher. But, would I be happy? After 15 years of knowing him, I can’t imagine that I would be. He’s not the part that completes me…our personalities don’t compliment each other at all. I’m not sure if this happened because we didn’t end up together or if this is the way it would’ve really been. Again, I’m thankful that we didn’t end up together…because I truly believe he would’ve driven me nuts.

I didn’t date for a long time after Andrew…seriously, Dylan was 6 the next time I tried the dating scene. First of all, I’m just not a “dater”…and with Dylan…I didn’t want to introduce guys in to his life without feeling like the guy would stick around. But, a friend had a friend she wanted to introduce me to. He was a police officer…hence my nickname, Policeman Dan. Dan is my biggest what-if. Mostly because he wasn’t horrible…he wasn’t mean…he didn’t have commitment issues…he didn’t have depression issues…but, after a while, he just couldn’t see us moving forward. I take a lot of the responsibility for this. I mean, I know it takes two to make a relationship work…but after Travis & Andrew, I closed myself off. It was hard to open up, and still is, and be real to anyone. I think that was the biggest thing for him…I never let him see the real, raw me. And that was most likely because I was scared of the real, raw me. But what-if I had let him in? What-if I’d been open? Would we have ended up together? What would our relationship have been like? Would we have been happy? Would we have gotten married? There was a time in my life that I thought I would have. I mean, after not dating anyone for 5 years…you’d think the next guy would be IT. But, for me it wasn’t. And at the end of the day, I have to know and trust that it just wasn’t meant to be.

Do I regret any of my “what-if’s”? Not for a minute. I truly believe all things happen for a reason and that God has a greater and bigger plan for my life. For the most part, I am happy with my life. I have my days…just like the rest of us, but I feel like I’m right where I need to be.

So, there you have it. My what-if’s. It was a long journey…and I didn’t even give you all the details…just hit the high points. And if you stuck with me through this whole thing, thanks…I know it was a lot…but, Ian…you asked for it! :)

Monday Minute...a conversation with my mother...and now I am the obnoxious mother!

Ok - I know that's a lot...but it's Monday and I have a lot to cover!

First of all...it's time for the Monday Minute, brought to you by The Daily Dose of Reality!



1. Who is your "what-if" person?
(What-if person being what if I married this person or am now in a relationship with "this" person)

I could do a whole post on this question...what-if I had married my first college boyfriend?  We'd probably be divorced because he cheated on me...he wasn't exactly committed.

Or what-if I married Dylan's father?  Probably also be divorced...because he drives me nuts now.  I just don't get him.  Yes...I'm thankful that didn't work out.

Or what-if I married Policeman Dan?  Well, I can honestly say I don't know how that one would've worked out...I didn't know him long enough to determine...but I'm guessing that one wouldn't have worked out well either since we didn't make it that far.

So...I can say I'm pretty happy none of my "what-if's" really were!

2. What is your nickname?

Jenn...it's the only one I accept

3. If you could choose how you died, how would you like to die?

Well...I've decided "I'm gonna live forever..."

Ok really - I want it to be peaceful with time to prepare my family...especially Dylan...

I really don't like this question...it's making me sad :(

4. If you could have named yourself, which name would you have picked?

You know, I'm just not sure!  I hated always being one of three or four "Jennifer's" at school...so I guess I could say something a little more original.  I have plenty of names on my future children "wish list"...but I don't know that I would claim any of them for me!  I guess you just get used to what you have and can't see it any other way.

5. Who were you named after or for what reason did your parents choose your name?

Well...I don't know where my first name came from...I think my parents just liked it...along with thousands of other mothers from the 1970's!  My middle name is the same as my Mom's...and my grandfather, that I never met. 

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Now...for an almost actual conversation my sister & I had with my mother...I say "almost actual" because I can't remember it verbatim, but this is pretty close.  I have to preface this by saying that my parents have a date night every Sunday...they go see a cheap movie and have popcorn at the movie for dinner.  It's just so stinking cute...sometimes I forget that they've been married for almost 37 years!  Anyway...here goes...

Mom: Guess what movie we are seeing this weekend?

Me & Missy: What?

Mom: Killers.

Me & Missy: What is that?

Mom: I think it has Britney Spears' husband in it...what's his name?

Me: (not sure at all about this) Kevin Federline?

Mom: No...that's not the one.

Missy: I'm pretty sure she's only been married once.  Are you talking about Justin Timberlake?

Mom: No...oh, I can't remember his name...

My mom tries hard...bless her heart.
She was thinking Ashton Kutcher.
How she put him with Britney Spears is beyond me...maybe she was thinking Brittany Murphy because of that movie they were in together?  Who knows...

And sorry...that conversation was a lot funnier in person...sometimes I think I should carry around a tape recorder or have people following me around with a video camera.  It really would make good comedy!

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When I was younger, I hated for my mother to wake me up.  She would come in singing, open my blinds or shades and pull the covers off of me.  It was obnoxious.  I always wanted my dad to come wake me up.  He would pull the covers up around my arms, gently shake me and say in a quiet voice "It's time to get up".  I have tried to take a lesson from my dad.  I wake Dylan up more like he used to wake me, although, it takes a little more force to get Dylan moving.
 
However, today...I became the obnoxious mother.  Dylan has been going to workouts for the high school soccer team.  They begin at 8am...so I wake him at 7.  This morning I went in, shook him and said "It's time to get up."  To which I got..."noooooooo, I don't wanna get up".  Five minutes later, I repeated the same gentle waking technique...got the same result.  Five minutes later, I walked into his room...turned on the stereo...bumped the volume...turned on the light and took his covers off of him.  Finally...he got up...but boy, did I pay for my choice!  What a grumpy bear!  I guess I'll think twice before being so obnoxious...or maybe not!  It did get results!
 
Hope you are having a great Monday!!!

Getting to Know You Sunday!!

It's Sunday again! :)  I spent some time with my BFF today and we went to see baby Ava today...too sweet!!! :)

Linking up with Keely from Mannland5 for Getting to Know You Sunday!

1. Thong or Granny Panties?

well...just call me grandma...


2. If you see a guy with his fly down, do you tell him?

if I know him...and know him well...most likely.  If I don't, then probably not.

3. Spanx or no Spanx?

I don't own Spanx...so I guess no

4. Do you sleep in your sheets?

yes...with a quilt on top!

5. What is your favorite Disney character?

hmmm...that's a toughy...I love Winnie the Pooh...and Piglet...and Belle...and Cinderella...and Peter Pan...yeah, I can't choose!

6. Dream vacation spot?

I would say somewhere warm...but really, we are having highs in the upper 90's with heat indexes in the 100's...so, today...I'll take somewhere cooler, but not too cool!  But usually, I'd choose somewhere tropical.

7. What is your dream job?

to be a stay at home mom...I hope to be able to get that job someday!

8. Who is your hero and why?

I would have to say our Pastor's wife...she is a breast cancer survivor...and after beating it once, the cancer came back as a brain tumor.  She is absolutely and 100% a walking, talking miracle...having underwent brain surgery...she didn't spend one minute in ICU!  But her spirit was and still is amazing.  I just love her to pieces!

Happy Sunday!